Scarface

Got myself a hideous scar about 10cm long on my right cheek. As if I am already not ugly enough. It was a very freak accident. I could do that 1000 times and 999 times come out unhurt. But pian pian this one time I was cut by a zinc sheet while on army exercise. I know you know. How to be cut by a zinc sheet?!? Don't ask me. All I know is that my status has just turned from 'Ineligible' to 'Utterly Hopeless'.

All my bunk mates who saw me return ask me, 'Oei! What happened to your face?!' Some others add (half-jokingly), 'Siao liao. You gonna find it hard to find girlfriend...' Thanks ah.

Probably I was the coolest about it. I don't think it was so bad. Maybe I am trying to comfort myself, but come on, who has suffered such severe acne breakout and still come out undefeated and smiling? Me! Who has endured such bad skin and still come out strong and joking about it? Me!

I know aesthetics is important too. But I kind of lost that sense of beauty. Especially in myself. And especially when you know beauty is fleeting, and temporal. And you know if Nature does not take it away, God might. I think of burn victims and I see their faces. They don't groan as much as I do, so why should I, with such a tiny little scar?

I might only groan when God takes away the might of my right hand. Or the sight of my eyes. These two I cannot imagine myself losing.