Keep My Intellect

One of the key reasons why people write diaries, blogs, or keep photos, or videos, or any memories of themselves while they were young is because, simply, they wish to relive those memories. But the only way they can relive those precious memories is only when his mental intellectual faculty remains intact. But it is such a pity, because people may grow senile, or get into concussions, coma, or anything that will affect their capacity to even think about their past. Imagine waking up on the bed in the middle of the white hospital room, with unfamiliar faces staring at you. These strangers are claiming to know you. In fact, they said they love you, and you used to love them. Yet you can remember nothing, your mental capacity has been damaged. Or maybe, just naturally, you grow old and you go senile. You may even get some kind of cancer, and you start to hallucinate once your brain cells are affected. The things that are there mean nothing to you, instead you begin to see things that are not even there. Those memories which were once realities were forgotten. You forget the people, the place, the things, the breeze, the sunshine, the smiles on their faces, the songs of your era. And now all you can see are things which does not even exist. Your intellectual capacity has been damaged.

Does anyone realize how pitiful it is to be in such a state? It would be even better for him to have no memories at all beforehand, than to have such wonderful memories, only to find out he is now unable to enjoy those memories again. Even more unfortunate is that not only is he affected, but the people who were once involved and loved would no longer relive those experiences together anymore, be it his spouse, or family, or friends. These unfortunate events do not happen only in TV dramas. It happen in real life too.

My grandfather is going to be sent to the hospice tomorrow. I doubt he kept a diary, but if he had done so, does he still have the capacity to read, to think like he once used to, or even as he would have liked to? To be able to relive those memories? No, and I think it is a pity.

I dread that this would happen to me as well. It is too dreadful to even think about it. Too cruel. Not for myself, but for people around me.