The Music of "I Want You"

I don't know what is the power of these three words, but in terms of music, I guess it depicts, in my opinion, a kind of risk-taking, exciting and heart-throbbing sexual desire (healthy or unhealthy) in people. And no wonder, typing these 3 words in Youtube leads me to these three amazing songs I have heard before, all in rather different contexts using the same three words.

1. I Want You - Savage Garden



A 90's Savage Garden song that appears frequently to my memory on MTV. This song to me tells about sexual desire that can survive by its own without deep knowledge of a person. It gets lost in itself and requires no explanation. Personhood is relegated behind emotions, and it seems the person is more interested in the get-lost-in-myself feeling that excites him, like most teenage infatuations. No suprise that this song is rather psychedelic, and you can hardly make out the lyrics except the chorus where it simply says, 'Ooh, I want you...' It doesn't matter. Notice how many times 'I don't know' actually appears in the song:

"Ooh I want you
I don't know if I need you
But ooh I'd die to find out"

"I don't need to try and explain
I just hold on tight"

"But a look then a smell of perfume
It's like I'm down on the floor
And I don't know what I'm in for"


2. I Want You (She's so Heavy) - The Beatles



Proably in the same category as Savage Garden's song, just that this song is much simpler and much more musically complex. The whole song repeats "I want you, I want you so bad..." throughout the whole song intermittenly interchanged with a segment that conspicuously loses its love flavour and changes to much slower, heavier riffs for the lyrics 'She's so heavy...' What can this mean? Do the Beatles mean that the relationship is out of true commitment and enduring support for the woman who is in some kind of hardship or trouble? I can only guess. In any case this song is very different from the earlier kind of love songs that they did.

"I want you,
I want you so bad
It’s driving me mad, it’s driving me mad."

The above video is taken from 'Across the Universe', and takes on a Vietnam war interpretation in line with the movie's plot.

3. I Want You - Elvis Costello



Now, the best for the last. Fiona Apple's cover is amazing and is currently stuck in my head. This song is the most complex lyrically and brings a host of emotions, mostly that of passion (some say obsession), about a man who had a wife who committed adultery with another man. This song is angry, hateful, painful and passionate all rolled into one. It tells of the intense passionate longing of a man after the whole person of the woman he loved.

Bravo!

"Oh my baby, baby,
I want you it scares me to death
I can't say anymore than I love you
Everything else is a waste of breath."

"I want you
I'm afraid I won't know where to stop"

"I want you
Did you call his name out as he held you down
I want you
Oh no my darling not with that clown"

God Shouts in Our Pains

QL's dad's wake is the fourth wake that I have attended this year. If anything it reminded me of the frailty and vulnerability of human life.

God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks to us in our conscience, but shouts in our pains. - C.S. Lewis

How does one explain the apparent senselessness of pain and suffering? Some portray it as the absolute reality which all men must confront, and when one has conquered it by sheer Will he must be a stronger Man, more complete, more rational, unwavering in his opposing convictions to superstition or blind religious faith. Stare death right in the eye, and bat not an eyelid.

Others try to show that there is hardly any contradiction at all to a Pain-Inflicting and Benevolent God, but I guess I have simply given up explaining. To me, perhaps the Problem of Pain is unresolvable by mere reasoning. It is a problem, and I want to face it as it is. It is a problem that requires faith, but part of the tragedy lies in the fact that not even a relatively strong faith, no matter how true, might be able to comprehend the vastness of the Problem.

Therefore tremendous faith is necessary to believe that God can inflict such hurt on us beyond our deepest imagination and yet at the same time still not cease to be the Perfect Essence, Being and Source of Love. Can a faith the size of a mustard seed grasp this absurdity? The Problem grabs you by the neck and screams, "Insanity!"

The Fool wishes to master Death but instead was mastered by it. He wishes to embrace a brave new reality but retreats in his venture into a fatalistic existence. And he realizes that he was none the wiser than when he had first started out, and thus a Fool he remains. The Problem is too big for him to handle. The second Fool tries to explain, but finds himself gradually explaining away. As he prolongs his speech, rationality slowly drains away from his words, and no sooner had he started had he found himself engaging in gibberish nonsense. The Problem is too big from him to handle.

Why is the Problem so difficult to resolve? I guess it is a concept too deep for a Fallen Mind to grasp. The Fall involves an inability to comprehend the things of God. The Fall prevents Man, even one who is redeemed unto spiritual life, from truly and completely recovering the Goodness of God in all its glory and perfection. Man's heart is prone to wander, easily assaulted by darts of doubts, and these doubts consumes him and his weak faith. A man of giant faith might, for a brief moment, understand to the slightest degree how the Problem might be resolved, yet for most of his life, God has meant that he, fallen and sinful, will struggle with It.

That an omnibenevolent God with all the strength of His mighty power, should allow His creatures, and even His most beloved children, to suffer temporally and go through much senseless pain is unthinkable. And over and above that, to a more immeasurably hideous degree, to banish even those His children love to eternal separation, while His poor children weep and mourn in utter desperation, is repulsive to the Fallen Mind.

And to this Problem Fools have come to simplistic solutions. To no longer believe in an omnibenevolent God, or to believe that the Problem is really no Problem at all. Yet the most logical answer to the Problem, is that one must have tremendous faith in His character, and trust in the infinite wisdom of God through all these senseless pain.

Can I have the tremendous faith that I need, the Solution that the Problem demands, the faith of Abraham that says, "Will not the Judge of all the earth do right?"

Death Comes to All

Is God playing a cosmic Joke on all of us?

Across the Universe

I have just finished watching this DVD now. XD, Ernie and I did not finish watching it during church retreat, and it is easy to see why. The plot is actually almost non-existent, but considering this is a musical conjured up from almost nothing except a selection of Beatles songs, I guess I can really care less about the plot. Sometimes it makes sense, but most of the time you know it doesn't and feel forced, but you enjoy the music nonetheless (provided you enjoy the Beatles, of course). So to someone who doesn't like convoluted plots and Beatles songs, you can avoid watching this movie altogether.

What makes this musical good are the potent ingredients of bold imagination (by director Julie Taymor) and the time-transcending Beatles songs. I love how the evolution of Beatles songs are brought out in two rather striking themes: that of love and revolution. We know, of course, that the Beatles in their early career were unmatched in their production of simple and cheesy love songs, which to this day men will not hesistate to sing to their girlfriends. And their music in their later period was definitely darker, perhaps due to their influence by drugs. But both were great by any standards.

I guess this film will only appeal to Beatles' fans or musical fans.

Nostalgia

I still remember those days when I was young and I would watch MTV rather frequently, and record music videos on the tapes I have...which are of course extinct now and overtaken by CDs/DVDs. And one song that I can still remember from those days must be this song by Hanson. Listened to them as Linda was crazy over them last time, and she even had their CD with songs like mmmBOP etc. This song, I will Come to You, is one of a kind, their best I reckon, and is just so simple and amazing, and may I say, Beatles-eques too :) Over the years I believe I have come to love this kind of songs the most, with similar songs of this 'slow-rock' genre, like Jet's 'Look what You've Done', the Beatles' 'And I love Her', Death Cab for Cutie's 'I will Follow You into the Dark' etc.

When you have no light to guide you
And no one to walk beside you
I will come to you
Oh, I will come you.

When the night is dark and stormy
You won't have to reach out for me
I will come to you
Oh, I will come to you

Hanson - I will Come to You

My Current Ambition

Is to pick up the guitar. I just bought one thanks to Chris for $126. I have no problems spending money on it, but I must say I fear that I would give up before I actually learned it, because it is no easy feat for me, one who is musically declined.

And it will probably take a few years to really master it. The reason why I even thought about learning guitar is the fact that I believe hard work brings results. It may take years or decades, but I will be a fool not to start now something that I love! I don't think there will be guitars in heaven, but there will be music for sure. And I think one is no fool to try his best to learn something that produces eternal, heavenly sounds.

I always envy those who can play the guitar well. I am a sucker for guitar riffs. I am a lover of rock music. But the most I can do is play air guitar.

And I look at myself. Perhaps I am only good at playing soccer. But it has taken like 15 years to get to where I am. I shudder at the thought of spending 15 years to master a guitar, but I guess, with perseverance one day I will.

Laugh at me and my slowness and my lack of musical talent if you want, but with hard work, I am on my way. 10 years, 20 years is no problem for me.


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Right now I am psyching myself up to learn guitar by watching The Beatles tutorial on youtube.

Bloody hell, I want to learn all the Beatles songs before I die! If I can get to 1% of their musical talent in this life I shall die without regrets!

If not, I will ask God to give me a guitar in heaven and continue learning in eternity...

The Glory of Young Men is their Strength

I was visiting www.ligonier.org just now, and I clicked on a video by R.C. Sproul and he had brown hair, and he looked very young. I think he was probably in his 30's, and he was preaching in the same exact manner as he is doing right now, with his white hair and stuff. Some people might find his talking boring, but that's his style, very scholarly, academic. God bless him, this brother.

And it is just amazing that this man keeps going. The amount of sermons and audio messages and articles on his website is mind blowing. And I am glad that his sermons are reaching people. Imagine how many lives are enriched by him. And then I remember John Piper and the other writers/pastors who have such great ministries too. And they are continuing their decades-old ministries. I wonder where such strength comes from.

The bible says the glory of young men is their strength. Yet these are old men, and their strength will shame young men like me. Young men who are lazy, unproductive and unfruitful.

And I recall Dr. Stephen Tong. Always sickly since don't know when, this young man travels everywhere constantly, preaching, building, designing, conducting... he does everything! I wonder where he gets his time to prepare his sermons. In airplane trips he does architectural designs. If I am 1% as busy as he is I think I would have immediately knocked out in the airplane!

Shame on me, me who has constant thoughts of giving up so easily.

God give me strength.

I'm Fickle Minded

Nah. I'm blogging just for my sister Wendy in USA, who has nothing to do during office hours (like me, sometimes) and prefers reading blogs in her office cubicle, which she proudly declares that it shields her from being watched by others.

'Don't stop blogging!' she protested.

Just like a few months ago when I decided to give it up. But well, I have since started a diary and I think it's meaningful. But it's okay, I will just blog nonsense here. See the shallow side of me. Muhahaha.

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I just hope on one hand our deafening cries and calls for donations to Myanmar not overshadow what has happened in China. Sure I can think of many reasons why our 'hearts' seem to be with the Burmese more than with the Chinese, as if to say one has suffered less than the other (God forbid!):

1. The Oppression of the Junta
2. Their Poverty
3. Our hatred of the Junta's ineptitude
4. Their Humility
5. Our Close Friends There
6. Our organisational links with them

and the list goes on.

But if we were to cry so hard for Myanmar and yet be absolutely silent on China, I think something could be very wrong. Compassion due to familiarity is not compassion. I certainly hope that is not the case. People dying is people dying, whether they are known or unknown, familiar or not, whether we know some of them personally or not. And perhaps we like to rationalise and say 'well, the Chinese government is doing pretty well!' and thus turn our attention away from the suffering.

I say, pray for China with that same fervency.

Bye Bye

I'm going to start a diary, so no more blogging.

Wanted to start writing one for countless times (only to give up the idea), managed to write a bit when I was in army but discontinued due to laziness. This time... it's for real, and for good.

Time for more personal stuff to be written down, just not here.

Bye bye... :)

24

I am beginning to feel the aftereffects of chionging throughout May Day. This is what I did:

2am: Woke up, bathed, cycled to Ernest house for European Champions League match
2:30am - 5am: Watched Chelsea's 3-2 victory over Liverpool.
5am - 8am: Slept in his house. Snoozed the alarm at 7:15, woke up at 7:45 instead.
8 - 8:15: Cycled back home.
8:15 - 9:30: Bathed, breakfast, took bus to church
9:30 - 12:30: Mission Prayer Day
12:30 - 1:30: Lunch at Ampang Niang Toufu. Deacon Gregory treated us. Very expensive!
1:30 - 6: DLTP training
6- 6:45: Went to Tampines Mall to watch Ironman with James and KC. Tickets sold out.
6:45 - 7:45: KC suggested going Princess instead. Agreed.
7:45 - 8:45: Ate at Long John. Met Jackson.
8:45 - 9:15: Walked around before going to Mac. Met up with Lydia, ZL and MS.
9:15 - 11:30: Watched Ironman. Found it rather nice!
11:30 - 1200: Said goodbyes to the Grace BP folks. Suddenly reminded of Pris. Discussed with James a myriad of options before deciding on the "most exciting" one: go airport to sleep. We were hoping to save taxi fare by taking train there. Along the way we found out we cannot meet last train timing. Opted for Bus.
12:00am - 12:10am: Reached home. Bathed, changed into work attire (thankfully its friday so I can wear shirt and jeans), took some bible study material, stuffed everything into bag in record time.
12:10 - 12:45: Took 38 to outside Tampines Regional Library. Found out we missed the last bus for 27 too. James took taxi from Simei to pick me up. Went to Terminal 3.
12:45 - 13:15: Terminal 3 was so empty, and the lights were too bright to sleep, so we went to Terminal 2. Had cold soya bean (bad choice), before we finally settled at the viewing mall to sleep.
13:15 - 5:00: Slept intermittenly, being awakened regularly by 1. the loud classical music (an oxymoron btw, Changi Airport Management. I don't mind noisy hard rock because then I will be angry with the music. But play noisy classical music and I will be irritated with the Management!), 2. the hard uncarpeted floor (which only allowed ONE sleeping position, and you know how much I love tossing around) and 3. the bloody cold air con (despite wearing jeans and sweater).
5:00 - 6:45: Had a quick washup, went to meet QL, WJ and Pris and her sister. Surprised WJ was there. Pris treated us to breakfast consisting Teh, eggs and toast. Listened to a few of QL's morning jokes. Pastor and Patrick Jr. came too, prayed for her, and waved our goodbyes.
6:45 -7:20: Thereafter we parted. WJ and QL to work, James to home. I was still early for work, so went to Burger King, took a nice big sofa and did my Ephesians B.S.
7:20 - 8:15am: Travelled on MRT to Tanjong Pagar.
8:30am - 5:30pm: Work, work, work!

All, in all, it was pretty fun hehe. Can we do something like this for Leaders' Holidays, pretty please? :D